My view on 'whose opinion matters to you'. Let me explain.

What happens if I’m no more bothered about anybody’s judgment? It might lead me to a very reckless life. That is how hippies are formed. That is how all those hippies are formed. I don’t care. I will do whatever I want. I am okay with drugs, I will do… I am okay with this… That is why they’re formed. 


So, I’m saying... you should know what is public, what is private, what is personal. You should be able to define what is this private world of yours. This world, I do not want to let them down, their judgment matters to me. Who is that, they? You have to only define, nobody can define. It might be one. It might be two. It might be five. 

But each one of you has to define, what is this ‘they’ for you? Their judgment… that is your checkpoint. That is what is going to hold you morally accountable. That is what is going to tell you, ‘Hey, this is the line you shall not cross’. Those are the eyes I should be able to see without feeling ashamed. 


You have to define what is that private world for you and to their private world, you must be accountable to their opinion of you, their judgment… You have to live up to that. That is just to make you responsible. Otherwise, you’ll be a reckless hippie. But once you define that world, live up to the judgment of that world and liberate yourself from the rest of the world. Little by little, when it doesn’t matter to you how the world judges you, little by little, you’ll also stop judging the world. 

While wanting to pass the judgment of the world, stops you from being the original you. Judging the world is one of the greatest dissipations of energy. 


You’re going on expending energy trying to judge everything knowing very well, your judgment does not define anything. For what? There are things I need to judge. Should I take this project or not? I need to judge. Is it a viable project or not? I need to judge. Should I hire this person? I need to judge. Should I get married to this person or not? I have to judge.


Is this the geography I want to live in? I should judge. Is this my career line? I need to judge. 

Handing over myself in surrender is no ordinary thing. So, I want to be clear about whom I am handing myself over to. I need to judge. Judge and move on. Over. You should know that line. 


Yes. Judgment has a role in your life, but all the time judging. You’ve only one life. You live only once as yourself. Within your own ethical, moral confines. Live your life on your terms. And live this one life to the hilt. If you have to go this way, go this way. 

If you have to go that way, you have to go that way. You want to live here, live here. If you want to go and live there, live there. You want to change your mind, change your mind. If you have to change your career, change your career. 


Let me conclude in this way...

  1. Don’t miss yourself.

  2. Let the world not miss you.

  3. Do not miss this life. Make the most of it. 

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About the Guest Author:

Arunakumar Tavva is Director at UAE Exchange, who is a strategic thinker and Diverse leader balancing the business understanding, technical knowledge, and skills.


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The views, opinions, and positions expressed within this guest post is that of the author alone. The accuracy, completeness, and validity of any statements made within this article are not guaranteed.


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